Today I got a "Peak" reading on my fertiliy monitor! And it's only day 10! Wtf? Not sure what that's all about, but we BDed last night, and we'll keep it up until it's time to stop. ;)

I'm happy and kind of surprised about the Peak reading. It's so early in my cycle. I guess if I ovulate on day 12 or so, it is good timing though. Anyway, I've never had a Peak reading, so it was fun to see the little egg picture in the monitor's window. Last month I never got a Peak reading, and a little part of me wondered if that could be an indication that something wrong. But, of course, the directions for the monitor said that the first month is usually screwy as it gets used to your hormone levels. I'm just glad that there is another indication that I'm normal, ya know? :)

I want a baby so bad. I guess part of it is that I'm a naturally obsessive person, and this is my current obsession. (You know, I never thought I was obsessive until I was an adult. But now I find that I do so many little things... like I have to eat ice cream in a certain order: creamy parts first, candy-laiden parts last. Or, I always avoid cracks in the pavement - but just in front of work and in front of our apartment.) But I think I have hormones that are kicking in as well. I think I've written in the blog before about oxytocin in more detail, so I won't get into that now. I think though, that I'm totally half-full of this oxytocin stuff! Everything in my whole body is shouting, "BABY! BABY! BABY!" to me all the time.

Like the other day, I was playing with one of the cats, and I started tickling him and doing my own silly version of "coochie coochie coo." Then I thought, hopefully one day I'll be doing this to my little baby! Then my heart melted as the oxytocin kicked in.

I was reading a book the other night that was talking about how to make your babies smart, starting from around 28 weeks pregnant. They can hear in the womb, and hearing the mother's voice when she is talking stimulates development in the baby's brain. The baby also will match is cries to certain patterns in the mother's speech, which makes the cries more pleasing to the mother's ear when the baby is born. I hope that means my baby won't cry a lot, since I sure do talk a lot. Hehe.

But anyway, the book was discussing all of these hormonal things that evolution has developed in order to help with the species' survival. Human infants are totally dependant on their parents - they can't do anything on their own, really. Some scientists have said that the gestational period for humans is really 2 years and 10 months. Until a baby is around 2 years old, they can't really survive at all on their own (even then it would be tough for them, of course). So, nature makes sure that the parents totally love the baby so much that they will do anything to protect and nurture it.

For example, everything about a baby's appearance is tailored to trigger certain reactions in its parents. All babies have dark hair and the same color eyes when their born. The reason? So a father can't tell that it isn't his baby, until later when the baby's hair and eyes change, and by then the baby is older and slightly more secure. This tries to ensure that the father will stick around a little longer, even if it isn't his baby. Babies are born with lots of fat around their faces which makes them cuter and more appealing. They learn instantly how to make eye contact, and their dark, deep eyes looking deep into your heart ensure that the parents experience a certain "bonding" with their baby. As I mentioned before, the babies cries are tuned to specifically create a desire to help within the parents. And, the whole breastfeeding experience is designed to feel good to the mother (oxytocin, the "love" hormone that is also present after an orgasm, pumps through the mother's veins) so that she will want to continue the experience.

Anyway, even though there is are even more examples like that, I won't get into all of them. But I would LOVE to experience all of this. I would LOVE to meet this little human that is specifically suited with tools that will force me to love it. Not that I won't love it anyway, but how cool is that to meet someone created just for me to love?